comfort zones

Comfort zones just creep into our lives without invitation and without prejudice. It takes a hold of us and starts to build this fear fence around us! It's gripping! 

I've noticed in the last couple of years how I seem to have developed more concrete ideas about what I like & dislike and find myself in these gripping comfort zones! I find myself reluctant to try new things or explore workshops that offer new perspectives especially! And I know now that it is out of fear. And anyone who knows me will tell you that this is completely out of character of me!! 

Recently, I attended Ana Forrest's workshop. I signed up for it because my friends were going to be there (to cut a long story short) I had signed up for her firts visit to the u.k. but it did not run as she had become ill. So it wasn't something I had not considered before. I did not read anything about it; just signed up. A couple of days before the retreat, I received a email inviting me to choose the workshops I had wanted to do. How peculiar that those words caused me to cringe & contract! I thought "oh my word! What is this?? But...I had paid, so let's just get on with it and if I really hate it, I can skip the second day" Even writing this makes me laugh & makes me quite annoyed that I should have even thought those things! At this workshop, I received wisdom that was new to me, wisdom that had been forgotten to me & an experience that blew my heart open. Imagine if I had missed it because some words made me insecure! Because it was something unfamiliar to me! Imagine what I would have lost out on! It would have also been lost to all whom I had shared this with immediately after. Wow...

The irony of it all is that in the previous year, I felt the same about another teacher, Rod Stryker's workshop, that turned out to be one of the most powerful yoga intensive I had ever experienced!

I've come to realise this:

In the last couple of years, I have developed comfort zones that I feel really uncomfortable, or unwilling to get outside of. I don't want to say stuck - this is all new so I am still working it out. It's as if when I turned 40, a crazy switch got turned on and now I have to be so aware of this crazy space that I am in. 

I am in Crete on a retreat at the moment- writing this. I am still not afraid to come to yoga retreats alone at least. But..phht yoga retreats are the best places to go on holiday if you have no one to travel with. You always meet great people and you will always feel included and safe. I recommend yoga rocks here in Crete. So anyway. What I did have to do is drive myself from the airport here. Left hand drive and all. Let me tell you, I get lost even following a sat nav! And of course, I got lost....& broke my side view mirror! Aaarrrggghhhh!! But- I got here I could have taken a cab but the idea of driving on my own got me so scared I just had to do it. It never used to scare me, so it had to be done. I'm glad I did it. Whatever. The point is, it sounds so silly- but it is exactly these silly things that easily builds up into bothersome big things. 

How mad that as I purportedly gain wisdom, I lose courage? That as I seemingly gain knowledge, my mind should narrow! That with all this amazing life experiences, I should choose not to experience anything new!? Thank you yoga for giving me the insight to at least be aware of this so that I may work on it. And here I am bathing in beauty, nurtured by the sounds of crashing waves as i share this with you. Something unlikely if this fear fence just got too big! 

 

Cooper-Looper

pretending not to hear me

winning the mat space

Had to share this! 
This is the dogs favourite thing to do of late..... interrupt my practice!
I wonder if something has changed...
He loves being in the room when I am on the mat- even if his dad is in, he will join me.
Usually, he sleeps through the whole thing but lately, he will jump onto the mat whilst i am still on it and start to bug me. It takes quite a bit of telling off before he gets off it. 
I am sure some of you are thinking that it is because I have not been paying him enough attention. I assure you, he gets so much attention that he has to hide away for some quiet time. I am definitely getting him his own mat. Maybe not a Manduka! I bet he is going to want mine and not any o'l mat! Stay tuned... 

ps: i LOVE him
he can have whatever..

Star Dust!

So I was watching the last episode of Africa last night. David Attenborough is a legend of course. He even made his producer shed a tear or two. I certainly did. Some bits were heart breaking; freak draught that killed att the baby elephants in 2009, how our advancing population is pushing animals into smaller and smaller spaces that are not great for their survival, this one Masai warrior who had killed his first lion only to find out that she was pregnant...
And then some bits just gave you so much hope - more tears, but this time, tears of joy!
For example, how this Masai then had a change of heart about killing lions and how now the Masai work on avoiding conflict with lions. Whereas before, they would take the name of the lion they had killed, now, the lions were named after the Masai that protects it. 
What also touched me were all these other warriors out there championing giant efforts to help and protect wildlife. I love the idea of building an underpassage tunnel for the elephants so they can continue roaming (under the road that cut through their park) and more importantly, how they got it right away!

Sorry, i am giving you the whole synopsis of the program.

Anyway, a of couple of hours later, there was Professor Brian Cox show presenting 'The Wonders of Life'. He is the new love of my life LOL. Reinforcing the science that shows how every single living thing on the planet comes from the same source, share the same beginnings, through the explanation of the formation of carbon. The most beautiful science! When the stars within the big bang exploded, carbon was released and this began the building blocks of all living things. We came from start dust!!!!! How much more awesome can it be???
And there were all sorts of lovely tales that followed- watch! watch!

Unfortunately, the morning after was not so great. Stories about this fox that had severed a baby's finger, lots of angry people calling for fox culling, even heard a angry man went on to say we should also cull dogs (i am sure he meant dangerous dogs).
So sad...
I understand that the problem not simple. It is not that I love animals more than people. I love people too. It is sad that we keep seeing animals as the problem when really, we are part of the problem in a big way. But people who work with animals know that it is possible to live together somewhat harmoniously. Animals do it. If they can do it, surely we can too. They have as much right to be here as we do. 

It got me thinking... imagine if one day, all these amazing creatures are gone. I guess we would just be left with "food" and us (& the all important bugs) The problem is, so few of us are in any close contact with these animals that if they were gone, it would not create a vast impact in our lives. We are just too far removed from them. That is why if you ask most people in the city about global warming, they laugh- because they don't feel the impact- they are not polar bears, or Inuits. They are not in Africa, and these small changes do not capture anyone's attention. And as far as environmental impact is concerned, because we have not experienced anything quite like that, it is difficult for people to understand it or believe it, even though it has happened before- just too long ago. Or maybe we have just gotten so used to someone else taking care of "these things".  

Some of human endeavours out there really gives us hope- that as the species blessed with consciousness, empathy, great intellect and great abilities, there are those out there who are truly the hero's of life. And the very least we can do is keep informed with what they do and champion them on with our support.