Some time in the middle of the night, I suddenly woke up and had the craziest epiphany about my (worst) tendency. The one that ruins a lot of things for me- mainly, my happiness. I am very familiar with it but on this night- i "felt" it. Like, I completely understood it. I guess, i completely understood this one thing about me. It has taken me 24 years to have this epiphany! It comes up in my practice a lot and I have been working on it for a long long time. It feels dizzy that I have this new understanding of it! :-) I guess i want to say, I feel free.
I know that this will come up over and over again but I think next time, I will remember the trigger and be able to deal with it better. Some things, we have to just keep working at it, and it still takes years to nail (like some yoga poses!) The good and bad things about us take years to lay it's roots, and so it is to be expected that it would take years to undo too.
Patience and practice pays.
:-)
I know that this will come up over and over again but I think next time, I will remember the trigger and be able to deal with it better. Some things, we have to just keep working at it, and it still takes years to nail (like some yoga poses!) The good and bad things about us take years to lay it's roots, and so it is to be expected that it would take years to undo too.
Patience and practice pays.
:-)
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